Tuesday, December 30, 2008

Spastically flailing around..

It's that magical time of year when I actually play video games. I have one rule for christmas (and bday, for that matter) gifts for Tove: she should buy me toys. No practical gifts, no soft packages with sweaters or socks. I didn't enjoy them when I was little, and I don't enjoy them now. I refuse to grow up.

And none of that "toys for men" crap either. I couldn't care less about a new miter saw or something like that. I'll buy manly toys myself if I have some project in the yard that needs them, I don't want them as a present. The week after christmas is when I regress to my teenage years, and play games, build models, or play with RC cars.

In other words, I want presents that I wouldn't really ever buy myself.

But since I usually do it for just about a week each year, I really suck at it. So this year the suckage involved me playing the new Prince of Persia (christmas), and flying around a small electric indoor RC micro-helicopter (birthday).

Talk about spastic.

In PoP, I'm actually pretty good at the acrobatics (I like the platforming part, and I've played all the versions of PoP over the years), but the fights are really frustrating. You're supposed to be able to create those wondrous fight sequences with the right button combinations. I can't do it, so I just flail wildly around, mashing the buttons as best I can, and eventually I wear the opponent down. I'm pretty certain some of the bosses just decided that suicide was better than watching me jump around and hit things at random. Or maybe I just embarrassed them to death. But as long as they die, I don't care.

And Ubisoft must have known that no normal person actually ever gets any of those magic 14-hit combos, and I could finish the game in just over two days. Some people may complain that it's too short a game, but for me, that was just perfect. Last years game was Assassin's Creed, and the thing was just too long - I got pretty good at killing guards, and it was all beautiful, but it just took me too long. So I eventually just left it with the last long assassination sequence not even started.

As to my mad skillz at flying RC helicopters, I have yet to ever succeed in actually landing the damn thing in a designated spot, unless "on the floor, possibly with a crunch that sounds like the helicopter barely avoided becoming scrap" counts as such. And I probably never will.

But hey, it's all good. It's what christmas is all about. Killing people and crashing helicopters? Isn't it? Even if you're not very good at it.

33 comments:

Noel Gomez said...

I love reading your posts. Makes me feel less alone in my likes.

Renich said...

Oh man, you're funny, haha!

So much writting... are you practicing for a book? You have great rhythm, you know?

Anyway, nice to read your stuff... it sound pretty natural... in my head.

Neo said...

The first prince of persia rulz

Anonymous said...

PoP, Assasins Creed... PS3 or 360? :P

Anonymous said...

Savage 2 has some easier moves if you wanna beat up other people more ;)

Zibri said...

Lol! I'm also flying a micro rc helicopter :)

Happy new year, Linus!

Unknown said...

http://grumbel.blogspot.com/2008/1/prince-of-persia-triology.html

Hope you like it. Linux and PoP in one blog.

VrIgHtEr said...

You're not alone in not succeeding in landing a model rc heli well... It's just too damn frustrating... Try flying a real plane hehe... how's that for a toy?

Unknown said...

For flying RC heli's I found the following very useful http://www.dream-models.com/eco/flying-index.html

As for the 14-key-comboz I'm also finding it very difficult to cope with. That's why I really enjoyed the 2 previous god of war's.

Unknown said...

Please, try to use a USB missile launche against your RC Hélicopter ;-).

http://www.engadget.com/2008/01/05/usb-missile-launcher-adopts-webcam-for-geeky-wars-over-msn/

Tushar Khairnar said...

Hi Linus

I have read your book Just For Fun and was fun and this post is too funny.

Gr8 going Linus

I personally thank you for linux revolution.

Happy and Very Prosperous new Year to you, Linux and your family

Tushar

Dieter_be said...

Try "Uncharted: Drake's fortune", also an adventure/shooting game with a few platform/puzzle elements, and if you want to do manual combat, you only need 2 buttons. The game is not very long, it's known for it's theatrical/movie-like story and is overall well received.

Mackos-gnu said...

You are mad.
Bu7t i enjoy think about there is the word "spastic" in english.
For years i belived that word was a stupid italian's word.
Happy NY and BDay

!Teq-uila Del Zapata said...

I never knew Linus played PoP or Assassin. All I knew was Linus played was Q3, that too under the hood of testing Graphics drivers or sound drivers.
But its kool to know that Linus too plays other games and listen to some heavy metal.

Bob Hazard said...

You are not alone in hating the new fight system, see Yahtzee's' latest video:

http://www.escapistmagazine.com/videos/view/zero-punctuation/482-Prince-of-Persia

Anonymous said...

Linus, please don't stop blogging!
I love your style.

Happy new year!

(And of course I also don't want to miss the opportunity to personally thank you for Linux: Thank you, Linus ;-)

Jos van den Oever said...

Congratulations on an excellent way to spend Christmas.

Personally, I've played Tomb Raider: Legend (on linux with wine) which I picked up for four euros. Great game for a couple of days of fun. It features nice underwater stretches and high altitude climbing. Probably very similar to Prince of Persia.

In the useless hardware area, I soldered a nice little robot. Soldering is a new adventure for me and it went rather well. All contacts look great. The same can not be said of certain members of our furniture which receive a black patch. The robot is not entirely happy either. Electronically all's well, but the soldering stick has melted some of its gear teeth and now it is limping.

Oh well, 2009 has arrived so back to more serious things.

Have you read 'The Great Pretender' by Theo Jansen? If not, do. It is mostly about building robots from PVC conduits.
Suits you, sir!

http://www.strandbeest.com/shop/#book_en

mdi said...

You might enjoy this review of Prince of Persia:

http://www.escapistmagazine.com/videos/view/zero-punctuation/482-Prince-of-Persia

I found it hilarious.

JaY said...

I am quite the opposite with gifts. Home made gifts or cards are what I really cherish.. When I was younger it was the other way of course.. I can get most of the gadgets on my own..

As for cool toys.. I did see a remote control 80 (lpg fork lift) that looked neat... I would probably get bored of it and take it apart like most of the stuff I pick up. :)

Ryan said...

That's what Christmas is all about, Charlie Brown!

Unknown said...

sen hälsning men ha en god fortsättning på året önskar www.universumnyheter.fi

The Cheap-Arse Film Critic said...

A friend of mine got botha helicopter and the new "Prince of Persia" game for Christmas. He doesn't much rate the game, but watching him use the 'copter to kil flies was fun.

Unknown said...

Are you plaing on Windows? :D Joke, afcourse...

androido said...

hi linus,

my first post on ur blog,recently i started working on linux its just awesome 'n i've never gone back to that damned windows box again,must say u did an awesome job inventing linux the best thing that happened to computers else *selfishsoft* would have looted us of all our hard earned money ; ) hey loads of good wishes and appreciations for you man, ur a true hero, may all your dreams come true and yeah a very Happy Birthday (Dec 28), keep rocking!

androido

Toumal said...

Hey Linus, you should think about getting yourself an RC simulator to practice heli flight. Saves a lot of money and frustration.

As far as micro helos go, I love my Walkera 4#3b to death. It's fixed pitch but it's near indestructible and flies really well. There's a collective-pitch version called 4G3 but that one's also harder to fly and easier to break ;)

Anonymous said...

Hi Linus. My name is Lucas and I am from Brazil.
I am writing a guide for begginings in Linux.
I want to show for you.
If it is possible, contact me:
lucas.linux@hotmail.com

Thank you and Sorry for my poor English...

Robin Edwards said...

Linus....loving the blog, as a new adventurer to this blogging malarky, ive been searching for blogs to follow...yours my friend is the first real "of interest blog" ive found. Keep up the good work. Very funny.
I too am "spastically flailing" at PoP...its vastly removed from the original brilliance in my opinion...oops boss is coming, need to look busy.

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